You,

First man in my life,

Used to carry me through the road for fear of my safety,

Yet you are part of the reason I’m traumatized deeply,

Abused physically and mentally, Stress just fit to my dailies.

Last weekend you laid your hand on me,

I didn’t back down and took a brawl that trauma me silently,

I paid your debt, I paid your loan,

This I shall not take as I help you until I’m half insane.

I brushed off the childhood you gave,

Despite my old wounds kept surfacing as I grew old,

My body weakens due to early stress and physical abuse when I’m just few years old,

I help as you are the one, who gave me life and are simply a human yourself,

I forgave and again I help and kept in mind this is your last straw.

I admit I never had a good childhood,

I never felt safe under my own roof,

My life canvas is given grey, which is why I diligently colour my life everyday.

I used to struggle daily asking God why?

Why gave me such life?

Why put me through such tormenting childhood?

As I grew, God shows me His answers,

He showed me how useful is the wisdom I gain through the hurt and pain,

He gave me Angels and Guardians, whom I called strangers,

He blessed me path that is nice enough for me to say I am content,

Though it is not padded road but He gave me soles that is strong enough to endure the hot fiery road,

He gave me cure when I’m burnt,

To laugh away my misery He gave me funny Guardians,

Don’t confuse over the Two He,

As one is the almighty while one is the humble human maker,

Both gave me life to this world I must say,

One did mistake and apologize,

One kept giving me task that multiply,

I trust the journey I’m on may lead me to a great Life,

Just that now I need faith to go through the hectic time,

May the Almighty bless Miracles for this tiny little being,

And give her Strength to face the task that is mountain high,

And she shall continue colours another day of her little life.

Written by

Jolyn Goh

08 / 06 / 2009